Thursday, October 07, 2010

Gaming Groups: Away From The Gaming Table...

Good Evening, All:

Back in the day, when I began gaming, my gaming group was fairly large. Not only did we game together, but we hung out and spent time together as friends. We went to the movies. We ate out, or did a huge potluck thing, and spent time hanging out doing things besides gaming. Most of us were involved in a soft-weapon combat society called Amtgard, a kind of padded weapon live-action D&D system. Aside from the weekly battlegames, we went camping at events, feasting in garb, and drumming at revels late into the night. We were there for one another's weddings, our divorces and even the occasional funeral. We were like a household or clan, an order or club, a brotherhood or gang. We were like family, and it was great!

Many years have passed, and now we have fuller lives. We are married, we have kids, we have lives outside the game. We've moved on from our surrogate family. Now, the gamers in my gaming group rarely do anything outside of the regular gaming session. We aren't that close. (Well, a few of them are fortunately old friends from that time period, and I am close to them, but we don't do many of the things we used to.) I imagine it's a product of growing older, of newer responsibilities replacing older ones, of lives that change and thus circumstances that shape our lives. I wouldn't change my life for anything. Still, I miss the old days sometimes, and wonder if it's possible to capture some of that, to redevelop some of it and maintain that sense of community after so much has passed.

With that in mind, I ask my readers: what kind of relationship do you have with the gamers in your group? What kind of things do you do with them away from the gaming table, if anything? What kind of relationship do you think you should have with them?

With Regards,

1 comment:

JDJarvis said...

I have pretty good relation with the Gamers in my Tuesday night game. One player is my father, another is my son. One player is an old friend from highschool who I hang out with a good bit (he's also currently dating a friend of my wife). Another player is an old buddy from highschool who I don't hang out with tons but we still socialize outside gaming (parties, moving and home repair). Still another player is the son of the last gentleman. I'm the only adult male in the Tuesday night game that isn't a grandfather.

My wife and daughter also play now and again but they haven't been regulars in a while.

The irregular CoC game has my wife, high school friend #1 (above) and an ex playing in it.

Other gaming groups have people I hang out with a couple times a year at big parties and wedding type events. There is someone in every gaming group I've known for at least 10 years or more outside of RPGs.